i hate it. i hate everything. my life can kiss my ass.

so, my moms cheating on my dad, and i dont have to balls to say anything, and i need to grow some. and this guy ive liked forever, now has a fat ugly girlfriend and i hate her. shes bitchy and looks like a fucking cow. and today, one of his friends was talking about him and another guy turns to me and was like didnt you and gus have a thing? and i didnt say anything and the guy whos gus’s friend was like dude, she broke his heart. and i started crying. i knew i hurt him and all, but i never really knew that i broke his heart until i heard one of his close friends say it. i wonder if they talked about me or something? i feel terrible an di just want him to hold me and look at me the way he used to. i want my life back. :(